Winsome Cowboy

Newsvines seizure inducing ads risk lawsuits.

get the seizure inducing 'you've just won a laptop' ads off your site before I happily sue your ass and while you're at it give your desperate marketing head a swift kick in the groin, thank you.

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New Feature Helping Nuts on Newsvine: Identity Theft (UPDATE)

Out of consideration for Newsvine, and it being a site I have come to appreciate a great deal, I am doing it a favor here, and publishing only as a "meta" article.

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OK you can talk now. grownups.

Hah I hope this goes well. This is the grown up spillover area for comments, thoughts, opinions, exclamations etc for a one child one clown Q+A OVER HERE

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A 5 Year Old Grills a Clown, NO ADULTS! Just Akasha.

My five yr old granddaughter would like to know, 1- Why are you touching that poky cactus? 2-What is under your skirt? 3-Why are you wearing makeup? She says's, and I quote, "why are you so out there when I'm so shy" akasha. She signed it herself.

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Bush Senior was an Amateur; I ... am a Professional. 

I had been working in Japan for over a year and had gained a reputation as a bit of a drinker.

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Safety 1st.

In the early '70's, I moved to Nashville. I was supposed to be a doctor ... or at least a dentist... I ended up being a juggler.

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If This Isn't the Funniest Thing You Read Today, I'm Sorry.

From Peter Panic... here is a little story for you- you could do a whole book like this- you spend some time in show biz you have some funny stories. ask people to talk about the funniest thing they ever saw. heres mine.

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Who or WTF ARE These People?

I've been around, I have a life experience to date that has had me brush shoulders with NASA rocket scientists, famous actors, ditchdiggers, Chinese tailors, french woodworkers, Spanish mechanics, yadda yadda yadda. but NEVER before have I come across the concentrated stupidity N …

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A Very Interesting Man

Anthony Livingspace turned his back on society 25 years ago and has been in its face ever since. His neck aches. Nobody seems to care. Out of this frustrating void Tony pulls laughter.

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The Forgotten Revolutionaries Who Shunned Terrorism

Apologizing for terrorism is completely indefensible. Have people forgotten MLK and Gandhi's teachings? Have people forgotten the Velvet and Singing Revolutions in Eastern Europe against the Soviet/Russian Empire?

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Three Cheers For The Brainstem

I had performed 8 shows in a day, I felt hard working and rewarded myself by catching a taxi to my good friend Chris's place. He was having a housewarming and I decided I would go in a moderating capacity, knowing full well that everyone else there was going to get @!$%# faced. Th …

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Common Sense, The Enemies of Our Time

In order to defend a thing, you must first uncover it's adversary. Once the foe is known then and only then can you devise a strategy to defend against it. All further options will hinge on understanding who the opponent is and what capabilities are in it's possession.

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Do Alcoholics Make Bad Clowns?

All the alcoholic clowns (not counting me) I know are quite brilliant, the same sort of risky attitude that will leave your liver, over years,the consistency and texture of a raw, three week steak can also be used in exploring comic boundaries of form and content.

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Life after a deployment.

Someone asked me if I had been to Iraq or Afghanistan. I said, "I went to Iraq twice.

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How To Give Your Overdose Class.

I'm often approached by substance abusers of all ages, either by mail or e-mail, which I would like you to note is my preference, or less often in person, which I tend to discourage, couple of reasons, to be honest the standard of personal maintenance associated with junkies is …

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Project Fly Fishing.

This project involved two business suited silent individuals named Procter and Gamble who's occupation was to go into public spaces with dead fish and flyswats and small containers in their briefcases.

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If you were to punch someones front tooth out, hand them a can of Fosters Lager and ask them what they thought of the taste, they would say --"Pith" or "Pithy"

DeLay: My Adultery Was Different Than Gingrich's The difference between his own adultery and Gingrich's, he said, was that his was longer and thicker. . Bird @!$%#s on Bush During Press Conference

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The leaderboard's borked.

So i check the leaderboard from time to time, I won't pretend i don't care, I've written articles about being number one and also falling from the number one spot the very next day. It was fun. So a few weeks back I checked it and my ranking suggested i lived on Pluto.

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Project Nagasaki Circus

I wrote a story a while back Back when i used to , as you can see, be extremely popular about the place It was the tale of one of my many misadventures, this one being employed as a guest performer in a Filipino circus in Nagasaki.

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Easter Show Auckland NZ

DAY ONE ROYAL EASTER SHOW AUCKLAND Woke up with an opaque foreboding. Remembered it was the first day of the Easter show

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Dear Customer.

Hello and welcome to dial a Pygmy, here at dial a Pygmy we have Pygmies of all shapes and sizes. [mostly small though.] Oh I'm sorry, wrong website, I'll start again. Greetings customers.

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How are my insults affecting you?

Given one sentence articles are the new black I thought I'd jump aboard and contribute to the new class of 'professional journalism' we are all trying so hard to emulate, to the extent that I am offering my services, for entertainments sake, as an insulter of note by agreeing to  …

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Does this not strike you as odd?

Pistoff lebean Jim phelps Barbara251507 annie251509 sue251515 semperphi mandres cheryl fillinger al251533 jeff251533 david251534 mary251536 antonyNM debbie251541 frankie251550 arther251550 susan251554 monica s msminnestga

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About winsomecowboy

Articles Posted: 64
Links Seeded: 904
Member Since: 6/2006Last Seen: 11/07/2009

My whole life is an unrelenting parade of mistake.

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